Tips for Using the Lady’s Room
By Leslee M. Anthony
Here are a few suggestions on coping with and overcoming that trauma called, The Ladies Room. Eventually we all arrive at that point when we can no longer avoid the inevitable and the Ladies room is a must. That first trip is the worst and even though it seems to get easier, each time there is always a bit of apprehension when we have to “go.”
Tip 1. If all else fails, wait until you have reached the desperate stage and there is no other choice. As we procrastinate we get timid and/or self-conscious and that is fatal whether you are shopping or going to the ladies room. Believe it or not, you must approach this trip positively, aggressively and confidently. Anything less will create suspicion. So, from desperation is born confidence. As you will see later, speed is of the essence, and desperation in this matter will generate speed.
Tip 2. Pick one that is relatively secluded but not particularly well used and of moderate size, if you have a choice, as in a mall. On that first visit avoid the large public facilities because your discomfort level will be in direct proportion to the number of people you are likely to meet. It is very common in a ladies room to have to wait along with other ladies for an available cubicle. The others may or may not feel inclined to scrutinize you, probably not but one never knows. The small ladies rooms are the most uncomfortable, especially in a crowded place like a night club or restaurant. The wait is often long, the line crowded and the clientele curious. Not good!! If possible go during a “down time.” See Tip 4.
Tip 3. Ladies don’t visit a toilet, they go and have done with it, so DO NOT loiter, linger or otherwise delay your trip. This is a mission not a guided tour. If your make-up needs fixing do it someplace else, not here, not now. Get in, get out and reduce the opportunity for being observed. Remember Tip #1, speed is of the essence.
Tip 4. If possible, watch the ladies room entry and see how many have entered and how many have left in some predetermined period, like say, 5 minutes. If the traffic is steady and there seems to be little or no wait, DO IT! If a person enters and 5 minutes later is still in there then either she has drowned, there is a long line or there is a back entrance. Option 2 most likely. Or, simply watch a selected person, count the number of persons who enter after she does and until she leaves. Now you know how many are in there and how long it will take. If all else fails, have a female friend perform a scouting mission. Maybe even accompany you, there is safety in numbers.
Tip 5. Be aware that behind any door there may be a person, or persons standing. Tip 4 can help eliminate surprises but not if the person is simply waiting. Maybe a group (2 or more) is standing there discussing their respective dates or their late evening plans. Visiting, contrary to Tip 2, but it does happen, especially in a work or office environment. Such a group will examine every person who enters since the group wants privacy and they want to see just what you are up to. So, Tip 3, get in, get out and neither smile nor frown. If you expect the unexpected it will be easier to handle than total surprise.
Tip 6. Be a Lady. What can be more of a give away than feet pointing in the wrong direction. It is even a good idea to practice at home so that when the time comes it will be at least a practiced event if not a natural one. Basically, you sit and keep as silent as possible. It is easy with practice. What that also says is that what you wear can have as much an effect on your femininity as how you wear it. I once wore a jump suit, quite stylish, very chic and totally impossible to get into and out of in a ladies room cubicle. I had to virtually disrobe, sleeves dangling and quite unmanageable. Needless to say I no longer wear jump suits, and what I do wear has an “easy access” style. This is an excellent argument for hose and garter belts versus panty hose.
Tip 7. Related to Tip 2. Don’t be vain. If your make-up needs adjusting then maybe you shouldn’t be out in the first place. Nose powder? Do it at the table or someplace else less conspicuous than in front of other close-in ladies.
Tip 8. Relax, it has to be done and even a chance encounter is less embarrassing than an accident.
Category: Transgender History, Transgender How To, Transgender Opinion
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